Crank it in 5-4-3-2-1

The workout last night. I. AM. SORE!

I have a love/hate relationship with a male disembodied voice. I have dubbed him Mr. Crank-It, let me explain. Whenever we have a timed circuit exercise program at the gym there is this pre-recorded male voice, not unlike Siri (she I loathe with a passion, here and here is why), that comes on over the blaring music to inform us when to begin, when we've reached the halfway mark, to stop and move on to the next station and how many rounds we've completed.

Crank it in 5 - 4 - 3 - 2 - 1

Let the games begin! Admittedly the first round isn't so bad, but with each subsequent round, yeah, I start feeling the hate and love toward Mr. Crank-It. Here's my inner dialogue.

You have completed two rounds.

Really, only two?! Criminy, there's two more to go!! I HATE you, Mr Crank-It. (Abs are on fire, sweat is rolling down my nose, arms shaking with fatigue) For the love of Pete, aren't we at the halfway point yet?!

Halfway

Yes, there's an end in sight, I LOVE you, Mr. Crank-It! Only 25 seconds left and I get a break.

Stop

Thank you! Oh, my arms and glutes are killing me. I don't know which is worse, Spiderman lunges or wall balls? I'm going to have to toss a coin on this one, I can't decide.

Halfway

What?! Nooooo! Halfway already?! But I want a drink of water. Daaaaang, I got 10 seconds to get a drink and haul my glutes to the next station.

Go

Now just hold your horses there Mr. Crank-It, let me grab a weight for Pete's sake! Oh crap, OLY lunges are the worst, yeah definitely the worst.

And on and on it goes until blessedly Mr. Crank-It announces ...

Stop. You have completed four rounds.

(Panting, fatigued and drenched with sweat) Oh, Thank you, thank you. It's over.

Pause

Well okay then, same time tomorrow, Mr. Crank-It?

Well good morning, Glutes! You too, Biceps!